A walk in the park
By livingbeyondbcThis entry was written by Jaime Rossano. Jaime was diagnosed with 2B invasive ductal carcinoma breast cancer. Jaime, an instructor at a play and music facility, is also a college student pursuing a degree in Humanities and Social Science. Every other Friday, Jaime will share a blog entry about her breast cancer experience. This year-long blog series is in honor of LBBC’s 20thanniversary.
To read Jaime’s previous entries, enter “Jaime Rossano” in the search box on this site.
When a doctor tells you it should be a walk in the park – what do you think is really behind that meaning? The last few weeks have been the hardest weeks yet. I met with the doctors before starting my next rounds of chemotherapy. The doctor explained the side-effects and other things to expect. “This should be a walk in the park compared to the other stuff you were on,” said the doctor. When a doctor tells you it should be “a walk in the park” then you expect it to be “a walk in the park.” I was going into my next rounds of chemotherapy with an open mind and prepared for what was said to be a better outcome. I don’t really know what I was expecting but they told me it can’t be as bad as the other stuff.
I started my new chemotherapy and my body wasn’t having it. I had an allergic reaction to the new chemo within 45 minutes into the session. It was not pretty. I had an awful wave of nausea and a burning, red hot rash. I started to shake as if I was cold, I was short of breath and then I had severe back pain. This all went on in a matter of minutes. So much for this being a “walk in the park.”
The doctors and nurses took very good care of me and got the reaction under control quickly. It took me about an hour to shake off the reaction. I was on board when my doctor said “this chemotherapy was not going to work and that we needed to try another one.” I am ready for this to be over. I went in the very next day for another dose of chemotherapy and this time it went smoothly. Although I felt tired, I felt great. When I got home, I was able to pick Ronnie up from school, cook dinner, do dishes, give him a bath, get him ready for bed and do the things I wasn’t able to do with my last chemotherapy.
This was fabulous. I truly felt that this was a walk in the park. That’s until I woke up the next morning…
I had severe bone pain. I couldn’t even get out of bed. All I could do was cry. I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t lift anything, and I couldn’t sit, stand, or lay. Everything just hurt. I felt so weak and tired. This was not my definition of “a walk in the park.” This lasted for several days. Being in pain takes a toll on your body. I just wanted this to be over.
I thought by that Saturday I would feel good enough to go out. I wanted to get some party decorations so that we could have a little party for Ronnie. Ronnie was turning 2 on Sunday. He is growing up so fast. He amazes me every day. I am so lucky that I am his mommy. I was so lucky to be able to have him although he has to watch me go through this every day.
By Sunday, his birthday, I still wasn’t able to get out of bed. I felt horrible – like an awful mother. I couldn’t celebrate my baby’s birthday. I couldn’t make it to the store, I couldn’t clean the house. My amazing husband got up early and went shopping all before Ronnie woke up, he cleaned the house, took Ronnie shopping for new shoes (they were a whole size to big – but he tried). Next thing you know, we were ready to have family and friends over for a party!
I spent the entire party on the couch as our family and friends chased after Ronnie, made burgers on the grill and had a really great time. Being a very active mom, it was extremely difficult for me to sit back and watch. But despite that, it was a really great day.
To read Jaime’s previous entries, enter “Jaime Rossano” in the search box on this site.
How did you cope with the side effects that are associated with breast cancer treatment? Can you relate to Jaime’s story of being too weak to take care of household responsibilities but thankfully your caregiver came through and delivered?! Comment here or on our Facebook page.
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